Kindness can lead us to change
As I head towards 50 I want to say some thank yous
I was in that space that comes when you lay something down and you feel lighter but also emptier. You had never seriously questioned your beliefs and assumed this was the way that it was and would ever be. Now inside a day that way, those beliefs had collapsed. You are still left with ‘you’ whatever that ‘you’ is.
I met a girl over that twelfth holiday and she was returning to the Isle of Man (IOM) within the next day or two. I decided I would return with her. I needed a new landscape to work out a new way of being. I bought a suitcase, withdrew £120 and within the day we set sail for the IOM.
I kipped for a night or two in the room of another couple from home. I knew if this was to work I would need to get a job and a place to stay. I went knocking on doors asking for a room. After knocking on a few doors this girl answered the door and seemed keen to help. She and her cousin were looking for a room and if I found something they were keen to share. That motivated me and somehow I secured a room. The girls slept there occasionally but preferred to continue to locate themselves at the flat where I first encountered Clare.
I found a job at the Majestic Hotel working first in the kitchen and then as a waiter. I worked for seven weeks without a day off and when I had any spare time I spent it with the ‘Carlow crew’. Clare and her friends were from Carlow in the Republic of Ireland.
That also meant they were Catholics. But here in my moment of need, they had helped me find a place to live. I never spurn kindness. That summer in the IOM began to rework what I believed and my way in the world.
The summer was ending and now what would I do. I hadn’t done particularly well with my O Levels but I had done well enough to get a place on a Business & Finance course at Armagh Tech. I decided to take the place and return home.
I remain thankful for my time with the Carlow crew and how they reshaped my views of Ireland, religious identity and humanity.
Best day,
g
