Effective Allyship: A transgender Woman’s Take on Intersectionality
My take away from Ashlee Marie Preston TED talk
Photo by Denys Nevozhai on Unsplash
In my local community, we had three discussions via zoom on ‘Power and Privilege’. They had been scheduled before George Floyd’s death in late May but as the first one occurred just weeks after our level of awareness was raised about the need to understand our own power and privilege.
As the third session ended I became aware of a 6 session online course on Privilege and signed up for it. It was in the first session that I was directed to this TED talk video by Ashlee Marie Preston.
I would like to share some of what I noted from this video which I would encourage you to watch.
Preston starts her talk with asking people have they ever felt
- alone
- rejected
- small
- fear
In this exercise, she illustrates the universal nature of humans and how we most often see ‘difference’ over what makes us the same. The human condition, who we really are and how we see each other is skewed by our vision of race, class etc.
She deals with the rejection that is likely to result from activism. Rejection can surprise us when it comes from those we may reach out to when we are vulnerable. It is as if when another wants to share their pain our own residual pain raises its head and wants to be heard.
She reminds us that we remain unique and different in our own experience even when we may have a common experience of being a woman, being black etc.
She exhorts us in our desire to be an ally to pinpoint our intentions,
What is the real reason you consider yourself an ally? When you are dragged out of your comfort zone to understand another from another way of life your intentions will be your motivations to stay the course.
Ask, “Have we convinced ourselves of our intentions without really knowing them?”
Be aware, “ Are we using people to further ourselves, to feel better about ourselves not become better allies.”
She states that knowing our intentions keeps us accountable and helps us reach our end goal.
She told of the story of how she did not behave very well at an event at which she was the speaker. The organiser phoned her later and told her what she thought. She did not want to hear what was being said because it was uncomfortable and she went to her default position when she feels she needs to preserve herself which was, “I am not taking this from a white woman”.
She later realised the truth of what the other was saying and that she did the very thing to others that she had experienced all her life, made them feel small and dismissed.
Being able to hear the truth that she didn't want to hear led to what she described as a true rebirth.
I liked how she owned her own mistakes as well as presenting new insights. Better to be informed by someone who understands that we all operate as the judges and the judged.
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